PawPaw's Eulogy by Lauren and Elise

Elise - I never thought this day would ever actually come. PawPaw was with us our whole lives and it's strange to be surrounded by so much of our family today, and not have him here. Lauren -We've spent the weekend telling favorite Paw Paw stories, and sorting through photographs, pausing with each one, to share our memories. When we would visit PawPaw, if we had a complaint, whether it was a stomach ache or a headache or a zit, Paw Paw would go to his medicine cabinet and find the remedy. He always wanted to make things better for us. Elise-I remember the long walks on the levee, picking up cans with a stick, and whining when we stopped walking and I realized how far we were away from home. I never thought I'd make it back, but PawPaw always made sure I did. Even if it isn't after one of those long walks, there's still something comforting about turning down E 19 St. I never knew what PawPaw was going to say. I walked into the kitchen last Thanksgiving and he immediately told me, "Elise, it looks like your boyfriend has been feeding you well." When we would compliment MawMaw's meals, he would quickly tell us that he was the one who spent hours cooking it. He once told my cousin that he was once a major league baseball player. But PawPaw never had to tease us about cooking or being in the major leagues to get our respect. He was our Hero just because we knew how much he loved us. Lauren- I'll never forget all of the Taco Bell he used to bring me on Saturday nights. It's still my favorite food group. I'll never forget his smile, or the last time I heard him tell me he loved me. I'll never forget watching him reaching for my MawMaw's hand. I'll never forget how I felt when I heard he died. I'll never forget my PawPaw. Elise- I'm so grateful for him teaching my dad how to love his wife, raise his kids, and support his family. He was a fighter and one of the best examples of what a true man is. I cannot even say how grateful I am to have spent the past 20 years with him. I love him forever. Lauren- It's strange to go to his house now and not see him It's been hard.. really hard. He would have loved to have been with us when we gathered together at his house-with his children, grandchildren, great-grandchildren... and of course, his wife, but when I think about it, he WAS there… in the legacy he left behind. Without him, we wouldn't be here. I'm so thankful for my Paw-Paw, and I hope he has fun in Heaven because after dealing with me as a granddaughter, he deserves it

Adeline Grace

This is the column I've been waiting to write. Waiting and begging. Believe it or not, I secure permission from my family before discussing their lives with you. Several months ago, I approached my daughter Lauren with today's topic. She asked me to wait until she was ready. And now that she's ready, I've discovered something she wrote in March for one of her college courses. The topic was "Falling in Love." As I read it, I realized that after all the months I waited to write, I still won't, for it is Lauren's own words I'll use. "Over eight billion. That's how many results are found on the internet when the word love is typed on the Google search engine. Love quotes, songs about love, and scriptures pertaining to love will all be displayed and with one single click on the link, you can discover things you may know or may not know about the word love. Unfortunately, sometimes out of those eight billion results, you'll begin to see that not all of the feedback will be positive because not all of our experiences with love will be the happily ever after dream we've dreamed since we were little. More times than not, it seems like we have more wicked witches in our lives than Prince Charmings, and that's just it. We automatically relate love to a relationship between a man and a woman and forget that there are many forms of love. Parents, siblings, and friends are all 'loved ones,' showing the many variations of love. "Lots of questions arise when the word love is mentioned and the following is a popular one: 'What's true love?' I wish I had a dollar for every time I laugh out loud when somebody asks me about anything love or relationship related. I respond, 'Listen to what I say rather than follow in my footsteps. I give good advice, I just don't take it.' Let's just say, it took me a lot longer to find out what it's like to be in love than it should have, but now that I'm head over heels, I guess I can tell you what it's like. "I've never laid eyes on my true love yet, my only real love. I can't listen to the voice or even stare in the eyes of my love, but I can hear a heartbeat. I feel movements all over, and literally have to catch my breath from the constant jabs in my ribs. I've only seen a black and white image on a screen in a doctor's office, and even then, he has to point out her different features for me to recognize what I'm looking at. She's growing just right, and according to the doctor, will be completely healthy at the time of delivery. Yes, I'm in love with my baby girl. Some people don't fall in love until they've been on several dates, but she's stolen my heart from the very beginning, and eight months later, we're still going strong. "When you're in love, you are constantly considering the other person's desires before your own. Every time I ask the waiter for water instead of Dr. Pepper, I know that it must be love for me to sacrifice caffeine. For me, being in love means walking into Gap Kids before the Gap, discussing baby names instead of names of current dating contenders, and eating what my baby needs rather than what I want. "It's hard to forget I'm in love when I have someone inside of me constantly reminding me of her presence with every kick, punch, or hiccup. Every movement is a reminder of life. A life I love, value, and treasure." "Of over eight billion love suggestions, I only need one: Adeline Grace." On April 26th, Adeline's first breath took mine away. She has snuggled into the hearts of our family and friends as we vie for her attention. Lauren has responded to this new life, this new love, with more calmness and confidence than she has ever had. As she faces the challenges of single parenthood, I pray she yields to the wisdom of God for every decision. And I pray for Adeline to have a strong neck. She needs one to support all of the big ole hair bows Lauren makes her wear. Ronny may be reached at rmichel@rtconline.com

Happy Father's Day

It was many years after my childhood when I realized my father was way ahead of his time. He blazed a trail, going where few men had gone before… the kitchen. If we went to school hungry, it certainly wasn't his fault. In fact, it was very difficult to get out of the house without eating breakfast. Don't think he did as I would later do with my own children and point to the Pop-Tarts, or tell them to fix cereal in a plastic cup to eat on the way to school. No way. He insisted we sit down to eat the most important meal of the day. Bacon, eggs, grits, biscuits, fruit, and freshly squeezed orange juice were our breakfast staples. To give us a break from the cafeteria, he would occasionally bring us lunch at school. In addition to the hamburger, fries, and a Coke from Mac's Grill, the bag would also hold a York peppermint patty bought from Donaldson's Drug Store, conveniently located across the street from the bank where he worked. But the candy always smelled like Brut. I concluded that he would buy the candy, put it in his suit pocket where it absorbed the scent of the cologne, then pick up the hamburgers and deliver them to school. This helps to explain why I think of Brut and Dad and hamburgers and St. Peter School, when I see a York Peppermint patty. (Why I can remember all of this, yet walk into a parking lot without a clue as to the location of my car, remains a mystery.) I love celebrations, and am happy to celebrate Father's Day with him this month. I'd also like to wish a Happy Father's Day to the men whose lives I've observed, some from a distance, and some up close. Happy Father's Day… …to the fathers who work 40+ hours per week to house, feed, clothe, and educate their children. On top of that, they volunteer hours of their time at school, church, and in the community. May their diligent example echo for generations to come and urge many others into lives of service. …to the men who have jumped off of the corporate ladder, realizing the money they made was nothing compared to the moments they missed. May they experience the overflowing blessings of God for their commitment to their family. …to the dads who have the wisdom to draw boundary lines for their children and the courage to maintain those boundaries. Remember that the best guards are placed around the most valuable treasures. May they be strengthened in their God-ordained positions. …to the men who, for a season, or for a lifetime, have found room in their hearts and in their homes to care for someone else's child. May they reap bountifully from their giving. …to the fathers who are waiting for their prodigals to come home, or for those whose child has preceded them to our Heavenly home. May they find continual comfort from the Holy Spirit of our God. …to the dads who, at times, were called to also fulfill the role of Mom. This includes my own husband who spent nearly a year cleaning up after I suffered the effects of chemotherapy, taking care of our four young children, and keeping up with his job. He has never, ever, even in the midst of our most lively conversations, brought up all of the sacrifices he's made. May he one day see in himself what I see in him daily. …to the men who have been diligent to train their children in the ways of our Lord. May they find great joy in watching the seeds they've planted bear much fruit. These men may never see their names in lights or as the byline of a best-seller, but no earthly achievements would make me respect them more. They are men of integrity. They do the right thing just because it's the right thing to do, and I believe all of Heaven applauds them. Ronny may be reached at rmichel@rtconline.com

Thrift Store Treasures

"Ohhhh! Do you see what I see?" I groaned as I spotted the metal object which had caught my daughter's eye. "Yes, I think I do." "Isn't it perfect?" "Perfect," I said, jumping onto Victoria's bandwagon as it traveled through the first thrift store stop of our well planned day. "It looks like a medieval candle holder." "It's exactly what I need in my room." "Actually it's a Mexican lamp," informed the sales clerk. "I'm pretty sure it still works." To prove his point he put in a light bulb and plugged it into a wall socket. It's illumination quickly destroyed our medieval candle holder story. I bought it anyway. It was cheaper and easier to carry than the cabinet with the turntable. Down the road a bit, we enjoyed almond macaroons and mocha cupcakes bought from a farmer's market, visited two more thrift stores, and finally stopped for lunch. Victoria insisted we support a locally owned restaurant, rather than a large chain, and I happily went along with her plan. The really fun part of our day was watching my husband's expression as we unloaded the trunk when we returned home. "You really let her buy this stuff?" Michael asked. "Yes," I said. I wanted to say, "She has no money. Technically you bought this. Just be grateful I didn't buy everything she wanted." And there was so much. So many things from which to choose. Furniture, toys, dishes, shoes, books, tons of clothes, and a Mexican lamp. I wonder what the sum total of those items were when first purchased. How much was bought on credit? How many items were things the original owners didn’t think they could live without? How many pieces of clothing were worn only once? I could ask those same questions of every item in my house. And while I don't think we should feel guilty for enjoying material blessings, I want to always keep them in perspective. None of them will follow me into eternity, and few will even be with me the length of my short life here on Earth. I long to find balance in every area of life. Paul's words in 2 Corinthians 8:7 urge us to, "see that you also excel in this grace of giving." Seeking, desiring, buying, and acquiring may all have their place, but giving should always be factored into life's equation. My modes of giving should involve investing time, energy, attention, and even money into the lives and the areas where God leads. This is how I begin Jesus' command to store up treasures in Heaven. Whenever I walk into Victoria's bedroom, her lamp instantly reminds me of the day we found it, and the lesson I took from our experience. That lesson burns in my heart even brighter than the candle on the lamp. Did I mention she converted the lamp to a candle holder? She says it makes the lamp look medieval. Ronny may be reached at rmichel@rtconline.com

Recycling

Victoria was oblivious to the seconds ticking by. I watched as she calmly and purposefully moved throughout the house, gathering the items needed for one of the final days of her junior year of high school. Book bag. Check. Cheerleader bag. Check. Letterman jacket. Check. Two bags of garbage. Wait! Stop! Two bags of garbage? "Where are you going with that?" "I'm going to stop at the recycling bin before school." Yes. The recycling project she began last month continues. "Why, Victoria? Why the sudden interest in recycling?" "Just doing my part." Actually Victoria was doing more than her part. She worked for all of us when she snatched up the empty cans and water bottles we habitually threw in the trash. What I thought would be a passing phase in her never dull life has quickly become her daily routine. Motivated by nothing more than guilt over not supporting her latest endeavor, I've joined in and even made a couple of trips to the recycling bin without her. Once she got me started, I began to realize how little time and effort it takes to put aside paper, plastic, and aluminum for recycling. To exchange what is no longer good, for a usable product. Before I knew it, I was going through garbage cans in the bathrooms and bedrooms, salvaging plastic bottles to add to our growing recycling bin. At first, I thought recycling was a new activity in our home. It's really not. God has been at work recycling, reusing, restoring, and recovering for quite a while in my life. He takes my mistakes and turns them into life lessons. He dusts off the dreams shelved in discouragement and breathes new life into my renewed efforts. He instructs me to convert my worries about children into prayers, which then develops into a deeper trust and faith for their future. And He takes moments in my life, like a tiny slice of Victoria's morning, and freezes it into another memory. So, thank you, Victoria, for the lessons recycling has brought. May you always look for opportunities to redeem what others toss and find value in places others walk past. But don't start with me about being a vegetarian. You're on your own with that one. Ronny may be reached at rmichel@rtconline.com

Graduation

My Mom, who cries whenever she hears Pomp and Circumstance, claims she can still remember my high school graduation thirty-five years ago. She would likely agree with Mark Batterson who wrote, "Time is measured in minutes; life is measured in moments." Watching your child graduate is one of those moments highlighted on the timeline of your life, and will be experienced by many parents this month as their child dons a cap and a gown, crosses a stage, and receives a diploma. Whether that ceremony marks the end of Pre School or Graduate School, the event bears significance and should be celebrated. To the Class of 2012: Congratulations! You have anticipated this for a very long time. The years devoted to your education will be crowned with a well deserved degree, and as soon as that paper is in your hand, your parents will likely breathe a huge sigh of relief. While some may view this day as an end to education, I pray it is only a step to the next level of learning. A survey revealed that one-third of high school graduates never read another book for the rest of their lives and 42 percent of college graduates never read another book after college. I hope the Class of 2012 does their job to improve these statistics. Be good stewards of the brain God issued to you, and never stop learning. Above all, place the Word of God on your "Must Read" list of books. Just as important as the lessons you’ve learned in the classroom are the ways you’ve grown as a person, the friendships you have formed and the deeper understanding you have acquired of yourself and others. Remember the love of your family and friends. Remember your own sacrifices and hard work. And remember God has a special plan for your life. God has blessed you with unique talents and abilities. Use those gifts well. Eric Liddell discovered one of his talents on the track. Running was his favorite sport and he excelled at it. He said, "I believe God made me for a purpose, but He also made me fast. And when I run I feel His pleasure." Scheduled to run the 100 meter race in the 1924 Olympics, he was Britain's hope for winning a gold medal. However, Liddell dropped out of the race because it was scheduled on a Sunday and he refused saying, "Sunday is for worshipping God, not sports." Instead, he qualified for the 400 meter race. He not only won that race, but set a world record in the process. This graduation milestone marks another leg of your race; the end of one endeavor and the beginning of your next. May the future hold many new joys and accomplishments and be a continuation of all of the good things you have already achieved. And parents, it's okay if you cry. My Mom would.

Happy Mother's Day

It's May! Flowers are blooming, children are counting down the days to summer vacation, and I just celebrated my 53rd birthday. It's okay. Really. I'm not upset about getting older, or about anyone knowing my age. I intend to always celebrate birthdays and never stop counting them. Each bears its own significance and I'm eager to see what experiences this year of life holds for me. In addition, this is the month in which we celebrate Mother's Day. I've been blessed with an excellent mother, Jeanne Keller, who is the most giving person I have ever known. She's the quiet strength that balances my Dad's outgoing and impulsive nature; the role model for every decision I make; and the ever-available grandmother to fifteen grandchildren and seven great-grandchildren. Though none of us live lifestyles of the rich or famous, Mama has shown us how to celebrate every day. She excels in turning the ordinary into extraordinary and the mundane into magnificent memories. She loves unconditionally, shares unselfishly, and exhibits patience my husband only dreams of being mine. The fastest she ever moves is to pick up the check when we dine out. Despite her tremendous example, nothing I've done has been more difficult than parenting. Or more rewarding. Mothering five children has been one of the greatest joys of my life. It's incredible to watch pieces of my heart walk and talk and move independently from me, overwhelmed by the desperate desire to prevent a child from repeating my mistakes, yet painfully realizing they just might make mistakes of their own. I'm in the process of trying to download everything I think I know, and praying their gradual independence from me will lead to a lifelong, growing dependence upon God. If you are a woman blessed with a child of your own, you will probably agree that motherhood is, without question, the most important job you have ever held. From the moment of your child’s conception, you have accepted the responsibility to care for this miraculous life. Mothers share the incredible challenge to be available 24 hours of every day. A wise woman realizes this task is impossible without God’s continual assistance, and she seeks His guidance daily. No one but God realizes the amount of time and energy you put into raising your children, and only He can equip you for this lifelong commitment. I honor you for the job you’re doing with your children, and I know your impact reaches far past your own family. You often go beyond your borders and touch the lives of all of the children you love… nieces, nephews, grandchildren, students, children of friends and your neighbor’s children, as well. I want to speak for them, for all of the children you have mothered, and thank you for a job well done. I want to stand, representing them, and applaud your unselfish and often sacrificial gifts of time, energy, love, and, yes, money. And I want to kneel in their place and ask our Father to strengthen you, to energize you, to fill you and allow you to overflow with His love, joy, peace, mercy, wisdom, and blessings. Psalm 127:3 beautifully declares, "children are a gift of the Lord; the fruit of the womb is a reward." May God continue to pour out His grace on all mothers as we daily care for our precious gifts. Whether you have yet to celebrate Mother's Day, or if it was a few days ago, it's never too early or too late to call, write, or visit your Mom. If she's anything like me, the more unexpected the contact, the greater it is appreciated. If your mother is already gone, write a note to a young mother in need of encouragement, or someone who has been a mother figure to you. Now, please excuse me. I have a call to make. Ronny may be reached at rmichel@rtconline.com